I wish I could explane this, the feeling of empty i have lately, just of all creativeity, I cant explane it, im going to go and try to draw and maybe it will come out good, perhaps not, well mostlikely. Starting to work on my tarot cards, that acually might be what is draining me, because I have to put a lot of my energy into them to make them myn, and i dont know im just starting to feel empty, all ir eally feel is love for my boyfreind, no creativity, no hate, thats it.
and im starting to learn the more i stay away from people i spent a lot of time with the more i realize i dont like them, that I dont trust a lot of people that I met at school.

someone brought up a name that I dont want to have anything to do with, fuck him, just fuck him.

and I hate my job, i hate smelling like pizza and beer, I hate lifting dough, and staying late without knowing weather I'll get paid for it or not, doinging endless dishs, having my manager blame everything on me as a joke, because Im new, but you know what Im not some ones fucking bitch, and im not his fucking bitch, im just so sick of it, i wanted a job where i could at least look half profesional. but no, Im aparently not worth anything but minimume wage and crap for work, what else is new.

and further more... ive got nothing, im just drained.... oh well.... ill get over it eventually, go listen to flyleaf, theyare good